Balance – NICU and Other Children

Finding balance while your baby is in the NICU is very difficult. Especially when there are siblings involved. Unfortunately, it seems you are being pulled in too many directions at one time. Add this to the stress and emotions of just being in the NICU and you are in for a roller coaster of issues.

Finding Balance While in the NICU

For us, this has been quite difficult these past 5 weeks and I am sure it will continue until we are a complete family again. Sunshine and Mister Man are striving for my attention, while I am feeling like I need to spend as much time with Sugar Plum as is possible. There are just not enough hours in the day. Luckily, I know it will not be for too long, but it seems like forever when you are living through it.

When I am at home with Sunshine and Mister Man I am wondering what Sugar Plum is doing and if I should really be there. Then the opposite happens, when I am in the NICU with Sugar Plum, I am wondering what Sunshine and Mister Man are doing and if I should really be with them. It’s a constant battle and lose-lose it seems.

One of the things we have been really blessed with is Daddy’s flexibility. We work for a family business that has allowed my husband to take Sunshine and Mister Man into the office each day while I spend 8 hours with Sugar Plum. Then I leave around 2:30 and pick up the other two kiddos so we can have some time together before dinner and bedtime. Some days I will take one of the kiddos with me to the hospital so they can hang out with Sugar Plum and I. They seem to really enjoy these days, and it helps with the issues that arise with them being in small quarters together all the time. All of this is great, except it seems like this is not quite enough for them right now.


We’ve seen quite a bit more acting out, tantrums and issues with not listening. Even though I know it’s because they went from having me with them literally all day long; to having me for a about half that amount of time. It’s so tough for them to understand what is going on to begin with, and they really can’t understand why mommy has to leave early each morning and isn’t there when they wake up.

Mister Man seems to be taking it the hardest. There have been countless mornings when he has been balling at his window waving as I left, or running into the garage crying uncontrollably. It’s so hard to leave without feeling guilty. Then as the day progresses his tantrums and other issues begin. It seems like a never-ending cycle right now.

Sunshine has been taking it more in stride, but I can tell she’s having some issues with it all, as well. She’s much quieter and reserved and has been having issues listening as well.

We are hopefully halfway done with our time in the NICU so I am hopeful our lives will go back to normal soon. I am so ready to bring our little Sugar Plum home so we can go back to our normal routine and I can spend time with all the kiddos instead of having to choose.

What about you, are you, or did you, have any issues with siblings while your littlest addition was in the NICU?

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